I'd Kill For Some...

Carbohydrates!

For the last two days, I've been on the SouthBeach Diet. Lots of green veggies and protein, which is ok, but I could live on bread alone. Cookies, cakes, pies, ice cream, ANYTHING...I'm dying for a bite.

But no. In just two days, I've lost four pounds. Three weeks ago, I gave up caffeine/sodas/junk food and had a really low fat diet, plus I upped my cardio to an hour a day, 5 days a week. I gained FOUR POUNDS....so I said fuck that!

Sad Sad Sad.

I've got a huge headache...I'm not hungry, but I'm about a nervous breakdown away from a candy bar or something. Good thing I don't have the energy to go get something bad for me.

I don't even have the energy to write a decent post.

Sorry kids.

Smooches,
"W"

What a Way to Make a Living

Cue the Dolly P classic!

As of today...I'm working 9 to 5!!!

Ok, more like 8:45 to 6:15.

After finding out less than two weeks ago, that the 'project' I head up was getting cut as of last Friday, I haven't reacted well to the news. On Friday I was told I could start a more normal schedule, with less work responsibilities, but only on a trial basis for the month of August.

If staffing and productivity doesn't suffer, I can stay there, otherwise it's back to 2nd shift.

I've been sending out resume's, but it's way too early to have heard anything.

I'm still pretty miffed about all the changes. Since I'm under contract, I don't know how easy or difficult it might be to get out of it if I do get a new job offer.

I know I've been a bad, bad blogger lately, but now I *should* have more time....we'll see.

Hope everyone gets off to a great week!

"W"

What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man...

En Vogue and Salt N Pepa got it right!

After a disastrous past 24 hours, I was leaving work and up jogs what has to be one of the HOTTEST men I've seen shirtless, up close and personal.

His pecs were the FINEST set of man muscle I've ever seen. A nice layer of sweat, white tight running shorts...gorgeous I tell you!

Which is a perfect segue into another D-listed copy and paste.

http://www.dlisted.com/node/13065

"There's Something About Miriam" is a UK reality dating show featuring a woman looking for love among 5 hot dudes. The thing is...well...Miriam has a thing. Yeah, a thing. You know...a dick.
Miriam doesn't wait to tell the dude she's picked until the end and then he decides whether or not he wants to continue dating her. Well, the show is coming America! Hooooooray! On October 31st you can watch dudes get a tranny surprise on the Fox Reality Channel.
This is going to be gold! They better have security around Miriam, because American douchebags are little more "aggressive" than UK douchebags.

***

Quick update as to my shitty last day.

I find out that Kevin (guy who allowed me to sleep on his couch instead of cuddling up)...wants me to fix him up with one of my friends. I told him, sure I'll eat my shame and swallow my pride and when he says no, I'll be here for you as a rebound guy. He laughed and said, "OK".

Then my friend from the Big City who was supposed to come down to visit this weekend cancelled. I've been up a dozen times to see him, and he's promised to see me here, but nooooo. He's too busy. Whatever dude.

Then the guys..Ramon and Terry...backed out of plans of going up to the Big City on the last half of the weekend to go eat at a ridiculously overpriced fondue place.

Granted I'll save some $$$...but my weekend plans were shot to shit.

No word yet on the future of my employment either.

Smooches and Such...

"W"

The Great Cam Caper

Being a single/professional/homosexual in a small conservative area, it's hard to meet men. Of any kind. Even the losers are far and few between. Scratch that. There are plenty of those around here. It's just near impossible to find a fellow single/professional/homosexual with similar goals and interests.


Some people resort to porn (DVD or online), others have random hookups with skanky queens, and then there are those who enjoy a little webcam action.


*faint of heart readers need not read on*


A few weeks ago, I had finished my business and was fixing some lunch. I neglected to log out of a chat room, and came back to the PC to find an IM from a young gentleman saying "Hey! C2C? (For those not in the know...see to see or cam to cam...it's kinda only fair...i see you...you see me..etc).


I told him I was good for the day, but maybe tomorrow.


He sends me an invite to watch anyway.


*Smoke pours out my ears, my tongue drops to the floor, and my eyes bug out*


Totally hot guy...a little on the too hot for "W" scale...but very nice to look at nonetheless. Nice pecs, flat stomach, the start of a 6 pack poking through. And not so shabby from the waist down either.


Let's just say I was enticed to C2C.


Eventually he says..."show face?"


No matter how attractive or what the situation is...I hardly ever show face...just because I don't want it to show up all over the world wide web or in the local paper.


Of course, I couldn't resist.


So we showed at the same time.


DAMN! Chiseled features, beautiful eyes, a very model-type look. What is this hottie doing with me?


Side note...I know I'm not scary...but this guy was about two levels above my realm of accessibility.


After a few seconds our cams angle back lower.


We finish, add each other to the buddy list, and say our goodbyes.


Next day, I find him on....lather rinse repeat.


A few days later he says, "Ok, I have to fess up. I know who you are."


*WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!*


He says, "You don't know me, but I know some people you work with. So I can't tell you who I am. You'll just have to trust me that I will keep your secret." I was thinking oh shit!

After a few minutes of thinking, I said you are *Chris*!!!

Talk about turning the tables...he was totally floored and surprised I figured him out so quickly.

Turns out "Chris" is 'straight'. He told me "I date girls, I fuck girls, but I get fucked by guys. That's how it works."

Um yeah right. Suuuure he's str8.

Not wanting to start a war or lose a hot cam buddy, I didn't argue.

He claims he wants to 'meet up' next time he's in town visiting. I'm not so sure. I know we're not going to have coffee and a little chit chat.

At first I was totally caught up in this new found fag. Now the newness has worn off and it's like 'oh that's nice'

I actually met him a few years ago at a work Christmas party, and he beeped on my gaydar....beeped loud and proud. When I asked the Gal Pal, she was like..uh no.

Did I mention he also likes to get down on all fours and show off that way...or lean back and pull his legs up to his head???

Yeah. Str8. Whatever.

Smooches and Such...

"W"

It Could Be Worse

I have a job and I'm still alive.

That's what I've been telling myself the last few days.

It doesn't do much good, but it's a reminder that it could be a lot worse...much worse.

Pink has a song from her latest album, "I'm not Dead"... with the lyrics going something like...I'm not dead...just floating.

That's exactly how I feel. I'm not dead, but just floating along. In limbo.

I had a talk with my manager yesterday. He didn't agree to my suggestion, spouting off some corporate manager type excuse. He said we need to come up with a plan for you. I reminded him he had 2-3 months to come up with a plan. Rather just saying, oh we're cutting this project, let's see what happens, I think you need to also consider how it impacts people and their lives.

It's ridiculous. Granted my work load will get lighter and I'll get a better schedule, but it's not the type of work I want to do.

And yeah that Pink song is totally about something, but whatever.

Smooches to all and to all a good night (day)

"W"

PS "Sean" is coming home from Thailand (actually by way of Korea these last few weeks)...he'll be arriving at another Big City south of my small town later tonight. Hopefully I'll catch up with him in a week or so.

D-Day

I just got the email of doom. Well, first I got a voicemail and a text from two different people at work about the email.

Then I read it.

"Staff meeting today...2:00...to discuss changes that will take effect in two weeks."

I mentioned Friday I was concerned about a different shift and different job...it looks like that might happen.

I just wish they'd have the professional courtesy to tell me and the other few people it directly impacts, as opposed to a company wide announcement.

Again, I was promised a long time ago if this happens, I'll won't get fired. Let's hope.

I'll keep you guys posted.

"W"

*******************

Update....

I got a call around noon that yes, my particular work project was getting cut, and that I'd be reassigned to another shift (possibly better, but not quite the work I want to do)...tomorrow i'm meeting again with the higher ups to hopefull negotiate something for me that I actually want to do.

Later again,
:W:

Sarah Says, "I'm Back Bitches!"

Ok, it's Sunday...just got back from the Big City...and I need to post Sarah Says or I'll forget!

When talking about the 'threat of lesbian gangs', Sarah says "What do they do? Ride around on motorcycles hitting people over the head with power tools and jackhammers, and then stopping to help you by pulling a first aid kit out of their fanny packs and bandaging you up and building you a new home first???"

Then we discussed names for lesbian gangs, Sarah says "How about the Angry Beavers, you know, like the cartoon?"

Last year, gay cutie couple and singing sensation Jason and Demarco gave a concert at church.

After bringing up the sexy singers, Sarah says, "I'd cash in my 401K to watch them have sex."

We talked about how a lot of people we know (both gay and straight) are breaking up lately. Sarah says, "It must be some government conspiracy, like in the music at the clubs...instead of the heavy bass going 'thump, thump thump,' it's like 'dump dump dump'.

While watching scary ass drag queens...including one who does back flips and somersaults into the splits, Sarah says, "Damn, that makes even MY balls hurt."

Another performer was doing a Missy Elliot medley and Sarah says, "This must be what hell is like...this queen doing this song over and over and over."

I forgot this classic Sarah Says moment from Bangkok. It was hot. Crotch pot hot. And wet, because of all the Songkran water fun. Pal James and Sarah have some running joke about James grabbing Sarah's vaginal area to 'steal her muffins". Due to the excessive heat and water Sarah says, "Wow, I'm really making a ton of muffins today."

And that ladies and gentlemen, is the latest edition of Sarah Says! We hung out more on Sunday than Saturday, but all the material came from Saturday. We joked and talked a lot today, however, it's all inside stuff that really doesn't translate to Sarah Says.

Hope your weekend was as good as mine.

Smooches,
"W"

Big Girls Don't Cry

But "W" might...

I do like Fergie's 'new' song, and I'm getting ready to not be a big girl anymore.

The rumor mill at work is buzzing...'big changes' are coming especially on my shift. Due to some budget issues and Enron like accounting last year, those big changes would directly impact me.

My position is part of a branch off the main business, but my paycheck comes directly from the main business budget. I've been told in the past I won't lose my job if the branch 'breaks'. My only concern is that I'll have to take a paycut or demotion or get stuck on some crappy ass schedule.

I'm trying not to panic yet, but the person I need to sit down and have a heart to heart with is out today. I was planning on calling in sick anyway, so I may just do it.

I'm not overly worried about being unemployed, just the uncertainty of what's to come is a bit unnerving.

Alrighty...of course I'll let you know how it turns out.

In the meantime...celebration! I'm going to the Big City this weekend, and that means I'll see Sarah and have some Sarah Says for you next week. Hurray!

Smooches,
"W"

The Bloods, The Crips, and The MuffMunchers

I don't read D-listed on a regular basis, but yesterday at work, Gal Pal came across this. Watch the video, then come back to read the rest (also from D-listed).

http://www.dlisted.com/node/12433

Last month, Bill O'Reilly did a story on a lesbian gang corrupting our youth and forcing them to commit crimes. Bill's show claimed that "hundreds" of dyke gangs were raping young girls and beating up men. After the story aired, GLAAD and other gay rights groups attacked Bill and Rod Wheeler, the man who reported on the story, for overstating the story and not giving the facts.

Bill admitted to overstating the story. Rod Wheeler also apologized. He said, "During the O’Reilly Factor segment on June 21st, while engaged in a discussion on Lesbian gangs, I inadvertently stated that gang members carry pistols that are painted pink and call themselves the “Pink Pistol Packing Group.” I was not referring to the gay rights group “Pink Pistols” who advocates for the lawful rights of gays to carry weapons for protection. Further, I mentioned that there are “over 150 of these gangs” in the greater Washington DC area. What I actually meant is that there are over 150 gangs in the Washington DC area, some of which are in fact lesbian gangs. Lastly, I mentioned in the segment that there is this “national epidemic” of lesbian gangs. A better choice of words would have been to say that there is a growing concern nationally, and especially in major urban areas, of increased gang activity, which includes some lesbian gang activity. I apologize for any misunderstanding this may have caused."
So there's not any dyke gangs?

That sucks. I was about to put in my application. I mean I could pass. Actually, I'm going to start a gay gang! We're going to spend our days watching the Golden Girls, making blended drinks, terrorizing Barney's New York, engaging in dance-offs at Splash and blasting Abba tunes wherever we go. We'll be bad ass.

****

Back to "W"

Wouldn't you think some people need to be held accountable for misinformation? Nah, not Bill O'Reily or anyone else at Faux News.

Later,
"W"

PS I'm off to run errands...hope I don't get accosted by a group of CarpetLickers.

Sour Puss

Good Monday Everyone!

Today is the start of a new journey for good ole "W".

After careful thought, and rereading some of my older posts, I realized that I sound like a bitter old bitch. Complaining about this, whining about that. I can't promise that this will be completely anger free, but I need to not be a constant venter.

It really helps to have positive feedback from all my loyal readers (all five of you). Lewis, I really feel your positive energy, and admire your take life by the balls and go for a ride attitude. Dirk, I appreciate your ability to trudge along with what life throws your way and how you can make comic relief out of the worst of situations. Mad Queen Bess seems to always roll with the punches and make the best out of ruling her kingdom. Kevin, dear sweet Kevin, your one liners and quips, and the way you open my eyes to new ideas, very well done my friend.

I've used the blog to share my frustrations and fears, and I'll continue to do so, but I'll also try to sprinkle in some sugar and sunshine too.

Here's to a great week...Cheers!

"W"

PS No I did not get laid over the weekend, but had a major epiphany. Details to come.

Gone-rrhea

By now you probably know I'm a huge TV junkie. Mostly reality shows. Like a car accident, train wreck, or Richard Simmons in a spandex onesie, you just have to look...if even for only a second or two.

I'm such a reality whore, it's a wonder I don't have a surreal STD.

Cue tonight's premiere of Big Brother 8!!!

Now I'm not sure which hottie was Dirk Mancuso. I think he's secretly blogging from inside the freakish Alice in Wonderland themed house.

However, leave it to the token gay to admit to having the clap, and that his ex boyfriend (also in the house...I guess there are two token gays now) gave it to him. He claims he was faithful, but I always say the guilty dog barks.

"Hello America...I have gonorrhea!"

What a way to introduce yourself to 12 other people and the rest of America.

This season of BB8 is going to be great...or not.

I usually watch for a bit...then phase out near the end.

Later,

"W"

Independence Day Eve

Perhaps I'm a day early with this, but Sunday's sermon and a crazy bumper sticker covered Impala prompted this post on July 4th Eve.

By now, you've probably heard of the nice favor our president did for his pal Scooter Libby. First off, who the fuck is called Scooter? Second, if some guy named Scooter is involved politics, shouldn't we be the slightest bit concerned? What crap!

The bumper sticker moron had slogans like "Pray the Vote" and "Friends don't let friends vote Republican". I'm all for voting your conscious, but puhlease don't vote your religion. It's called separation of church and state people.

I totally know I'm preaching to the choir here, but I encourage you to speak out if engaged in a political debate that relies on using religion as what's right or wrong.

Sunday, the preacher of my progressive little southern baptist church here in the small town, reminded us Jesus he has no political agenda, and that he helped the poor, elevated women, and has unconditional love for everyone. And he also said we should interpret the Bible as Jesus said or did things.

So yes, go head on this Independence Day...if you like your freedom thank a veteran...if you like a pointless war with more than 3000 causalities and countless other wounded in action, if you like pissing off the rest of the world and making things worse with 'the terrorists', then thank the Bush administration.

And with that, I'm sure I just got put on 'the list'.

Smooches and Happy 4th to all!

"W"

It's Your Lucky Day!

This Saturday, July 7th, thousands of couples will tie the knot in hopes of using 07-07-07 as a lucky start to their new lives together. The cynic in me wants to remind them that one out of every three marriages end in divorce, and ask them if they still want to play the numbers game.

Saturday, I traveled to Kentucky to visit the family. We all met for lunch, which was fine. Dad drove an hour, Em drove an hour, I drove 3.5, and met at Mom's new apartment.

A few weeks back, I blogged about how Mom and Dad were separating (not divorcing). They seem to be doing fine. Dad is retired, but recently got a job as an farm inspector and that keeps him pretty busy. It's still very odd to act like nothing is wrong or nothing has changed. It really kinda freaked my sister and me out. Perhaps this will just be a phase like last time, although Mom says she's not moving back in with Dad. She wants him to move and live with her, but there's no way he can give up the farm. Personally I'm not sure even if he could, he should move. He lets her do everything she wants anyway, so giving in once more probably wouldn't help.

The rest of the weekend was pretty fun. More hottub relaxation...oh and a friend came in town to visit. He was str8 when I knew him, and came out after he moved away. Crazy times!

I'm working the next 6 days, but I'm wishing you and yours a great 4th of July holiday week.

Smooches.
"W"