You Pee Like a Girl!

Hmm...another four days without posting. Sorry kids, it's been very rainy and gloomy here all week, so I haven't been in the mood for writing.

Among my ever growing circle of friends in the Big City, we've had recent talks about potty time. After hearing a few of the guys admit to sitting down to pee, I thought I'd give it a try. Come to find out, if you're tired and don't want to stand up, it's a pretty good alternative. Or if you wake up and things need help, sitting down gives an easier angle so you don't spray everywhere.

That was one friend's main reason. "You don't have to worry about dribbling or making a mess."

Feel free to laugh or insult at will.

I also promised a story about "Stuffing Your Face to Help those Who Can't".

Don't you just love big fundraiser events that seem counter-productive? Last weekend, I attended a birthday party. The guest of honor requested no gifts, but instead a donation to a food outreach program. I'm not knocking the concept at all. I gladly gave a $25 check, but I did feel silly looking at the spread. Salmon with capers, finger sandwiches, etc etc., and an open bar. Hmm.

I'm off to the Big City again for another wonderful weekend.

Smooches,
"W"

I'm Back and So is Sarah Says

If I have anyone out there checking back in, thanks for stickin' 'round.

There hasn't been a ton of new things or old things to blog about, and I haven't been in the writing mood much lately.

So after a three week absence, I hope to be back permanently.

Saturday night, I got a chance to spend some quality time with Sarah...so you all know what that means!!!

When asked about her new job at a medical office Sarah says, "It's pretty good work, I like it, but we get crazy calls from old women asking to schedule a mam-io-gram. This one woman called and said 'my boobs are so small, do I still need to get checked out.?"

Sarah and our friend James live together now. After recapping their afternoon, Sarah says, "Oh yeah, James played Jingle Bells on my boobs today with his feet. When he got to the chorus, he used my twat as a beat box." Then they gave a live demonstration.

Sunday's church service was a combination of the early (more traditional) and the late (more contemporary). The traditional people wanted some organ music in the service, so we had a special organ prelude. The organists partner and a lot of the other stuffy church members were sitting on the pew right in front of us. When the music started, Sarah says, "What the heck is this crap? It sounds like scary circus music. Like Phantom of the Opera on crack.!" This was particularly amusing, because the stuff old queens in front of us had just remarked, " I wonder when they'll break out the snakes and tambourines for the 2nd service people.

Sarah also had another story from work. "This 29 year old guy called in embarrassed because he couldn't get and stay aroused. Sarah said to him, "Well that's no fun!" The man agreed.

Look for more posts this week, including "You Pee Like a Girl" and "Stuff Your Face To Help Those Who Can't."

Gone and Back Again!

Wow!

This is one of the longest blogging breaks I've ever taken. I'm back. Not going anywhere. It just seems that a vast majority of my blogging pals out there are on hiatus (all for very valid reasons...sending good thoughts everyone's way).

I haven't had a ton of free time in the last week to do much...so allow me to recap.

Following the 5k last weekend, J came down since he's on cycle break from school. He spent the night Sunday, went to dinner with my guy pals Ramon and Terry (they liked lots him btw). Monday I worked, J went to visit his mother, came back up for dinner, met CJ for coffee, he went home. Tuesday I went to work, J came back again to eat and spend the night, and then he left Wednesday morning to go back to the Big City.

I went to a local community college Wednesday to speak to Dean's writing classes. It was fun to be away from work and doing something a little different. It was nice to catch up with him. I haven't seen him since Bangkok nearly 5.5 months ago. We grabbed coffee after classes and chit chatted about stuff.

Thursday and Friday were much slower.

Saturday AM, I went to the Big City, had lunch with a friend while J was busy working at a single's retreat at church.

Don't worry! He was asked to lead music and talk about music in the single life several months ago. After being introduced as 'in transition', he joked that the best way to meet someone is to sign up for a singles retreat. The focus of the two day event was to show single people they don't necessarily need a partner to be happy as long as they have God.

I went to his house, got the key off the back porch he left for me (i now have a key).

I also discovered J cleaned out a space in the two garage for me to pull in. I have a key, a parking space, and three drawers...for what it's worth.

Saturday night we shared a delicious meal at a quaint little Greek restaurant. I had the best baklava EVER made.

Sunday was church day. Great service. Long church meeting after. A few weeks back, I suggested we visit a local park, have dinner overlooking a pond, and go for a paddle boat ride. So we did. It was hotter than expected. I had on jeans and was quite toasty, but a breeze and the company made it totally worthwhile.

I played hooky from work Monday with an 'upset stomach'. Damn that karma...she's a bitch. I get a tummy ache mid afternoon.

Tonight (tues), I had dinner with J and his mom...since he came down again for a visit.

Other highlights from the last week.

My Mom had a 'come to Jesus moment'...and announced she'll be moving back in with Dad. GREAT NEWS!

My sister also suspected she might be pregnant. Today, a trip to the doctor confirmed that! It's early...very early...2 months along...but...things are looking good.

Ok...that's it for now.

Smooches to you all

"W"

PS There was a Sarah Says over the weekend (sorry sweetie, I have to)

When Sarah was much younger and someone asked her name she'd say "Sarah E-wiz-a-biff." Apparently her family called her 'the biffer', because she couldn't pronounced it correctly.