A Good Day for a White Wedding

A week from tonight, I'll be rubbing elbows with Jewish people and tiptoeing through an open pasture.

No, it's not Hadassah Horse Club meeting, rather a wedding at a horse farm in beautiful Lexington, KY.

I'm curious about the wedding next weekend. It's a Jewish-Methodist interfaith ceremony. My pal Emily from college is getting married...to a man. During our college years, she was a practicing lesbian. Now I'm guessing she was just bisexual and now back to the 'straight' side. I've only met the groom to be once...at our friend Amy's wedding nearly two years ago. Nate told Emily "I really like your friend Wes, he's the only friend of yours I met that seems sincere and genuine!" So naturally I think he's SUPER and will be attending the wedding. I'm really hoping I can wear a yarmulke...or wear one and stuff two in my suit coat to give me really big shoulders. Hmm...the wheels are turning...hehe.

As I was perusing the wedding registry to select a gift, I didn't realize one could spend $600 on a blender or 250 for a cookie sheet? Hello people...Target housewares or even Wal-Mart would have been far more reasonable. I was going to drop 40 for a spice rack, but when I went to checkout online, someone already beat me to the punch. I guess Thyme was my enemy!

I still haven't decided what to get now. I'm thinking wine glasses...or buying some fiestaware to complete what's already been purchased.

Then I got to thinking. Straight people can get married and have weddings and get outrageously priced cheese graters and gravy boats. Seriously, do people use a stainless steel gravy boat? Then I was reminded of one of my favorite episodes of Sex and the City, where Carrie goes to a baby shower and has to leave her shoes at the door. Someone steals her prized Manolo's, and the hostess balks at replacing them. (I would too at $500 shoes). Then our single gal realizes she's dumped a load of money for various friends, bridal showers, weddings, birthdays, babies, etc etc., and decide to marry herself and sent out an invitation to the hostess...with just one item on the gift registry...Manolo Blahniks...and of course the heroine gets her shoes in the end.

If I'm still single in ten years, I'm going to throw myself a wedding...marrying ME...and putting out a gift registry (at target...or maybe somewhere else)...and getting a shit ton of gifts.

This is also the wedding that sent an invitation to me only. Not "W" and guest"...just "W". I was a little offended I couldn't bring a guest (not that I would have necessarily)...but it's the thought that counts.

Later,
"W"