Wednesday, August 29, 2007

For the Love of God!

I'm no angel. My worst habits are gossipping and gluttony...so I've got at least one of the seven deadly sins covered.

However, I love my God. While I won't beat you over the head about religion, I can tell you some pretty cool stuff about Jesus our Holy Savior. You might be surprised to know the very people who condemn gays and lesbians (and everyone else) don't really understand what the Bible actually says about homosexuality. Perhaps I'll have a little Sunday Sermon segment about some things you may or may not know.

What frustrates me is Amber (and others like her) from Big Brother 8. When she's not crying and making the ugly face...


... is that she's praying and praying and rubbing that cross around her neck. Again, I'm all about praising and loving the Lord, but wow, Amber really gives God Loving folk a bad name.

I can't phrase it better, so I'm borrowing from the reality blurred blog.

***

Amber and Daniele’s Power of 10 appearance aired last night and offered some bonus Big Brother, but considering that the regular episode was about 10 minutes stretched to 44, it wasn’t much of a bonus.
Amber spent most of her time on the game show looked completely stunned and confused, her mouth hanging open until she had another opportunity to dance like a drunk sorority girl at a party, hands up in the air. But shockingly, she actually beat Daniele at the head-to-head competition, and when the show returned from the break for her to play the individual game, she was, of course, bawling like an emotionally unstable baby.
After winning at the $1,000 level, Amber thanked God—although unlike both Sunday’s and Tuesday’s episodes of the show, she didn’t say the most ridiculous phrase in the history of religious expressions: “God bless you, God.” (What percentage of Americans think Amber’s religion isn’t something she really understands but just consists of phrases she regurgitates?)
Meanwhile, she did her best to prove that she’s an idiot. When Drew Carey asked her about being scrutinized by viewers, she said, “honestly, I don’t know what ‘scrutinized’ means.” The $100,000 question was about pit bull ownership, and after Drew Carey joked about Michael Vick, Amber emphatically declared, “I like Michael Vick”; he then had to remind her that she hasn’t seen the news in a couple months. Her cousin revealed that, surprise, surprise, Amber’s family owned pit bulls, which makes sense, because they seem like the people on TV who say, “my dog was the sweetest dog ever, until it chewed off the neighbor kid’s face.”
After guessing the number of people who think pit bulls shouldn’t be kept as pets, she pleaded, “please God, please,” and started crying even before God showed that he doesn’t really care. She woefully underestimated the number, saying 18 to 38 percent when the answer was 55 percent, lost the $10,000 she had, and went home with just $1,000.
During the actual episode, the editors filled time by showing us extended clips from the game show we’d just watched. At least that was better than more night-vision footage of Jessica and Eric making out, although that’s better than Eric and Jessica sitting around the house talking about making out for hours. And that’s better than more footage of Jameka praying with the soundtrack of monks chanting, which was funny a few times and now just seems offensive. And that was better than more Dick, who basically seemed absent from the house for most of the episode.
The only good thing about that is that his decision led to another Amber meltdown, because anything that doesn’t involve her is wrong. “It’s a cowardly move it’s a selfish move. Eric is a power-hungry person; he’s evil, he’s got no soul,” she said, apparently forgetting that walking out the door Thursday is God’s plan. I hope

***

In Jesus Name, Amen

2 Comments:

At 2:50 PM, Blogger A Lewis said...

And now we'll collect the offering and have the solo for the service. Would you all rise, please.

 
At 3:56 PM, Blogger "W" said...

Rise? Giggles.

Speaking of solo, I think my cool new music friend is doing the special music for the offering Sunday, because he couldn't find anyone else to do it.

 

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